Jamaicans go to Disneyland, or world, or whatever -- Because I'm the washbelly -- Diary : the Gulf War and the poison concert -- Black enough to be called it, not black enough to say it -- The immigrant-to-basic-bitch pipeline -- Here's an ergonomic chair to protect your body while your soul is dying inside -- This is your brain on ganja -- Sibling rivalry -- My mother's wisdom comes mostly from homegoods décor -- The prodigal daughter returns. Again. For the third time -- I lost my virginity to a guy named brad -- Gather round and let me tell you about match.com -- Pick me, pick me -- CSI : ficus -- Google Docs knew I was getting a divorce before I did -- In the name of the queen (sheets) -- Periwinkle can go fuck itself : my life in colors -- Thank god for my broken uterus -- Red flags you're dating a robot -- Peace out, monogamy island -- The only teacher who ever hated me -- Thy mistress hath played the trumpet in my bed -- My ted talk vibe -- Journal : Noogler to Googler to Xoogler -- Is this funny? -- 10 Tricks to appear smart in meetings -- How to president -- It's so nice to be in hell -- I heard you're killing it -- Coop d'état.
Summary:
"A painfully revealing and hilariously honest debut memoir that chronicles Sarah Cooper's rise from lip-synching in church to lip-synching to the president of the United States. As the youngest of four in a tight-knit Jamaican family, Cooper cut her teeth in the mean cornfields of suburban Maryland. Soon she became a charmingly neurotic woman trying to break her worst patterns and reclaim her linen closet. From an early obsession with hair bands to her struggle to escape the immigrant-to-basic-bitch pipeline to her use of the Internet as a marriage counselor after being fired by two real ones and the curse of her TED Talk vibe, Cooper invites us to share in her triumphs and humiliations as she tries (and fails) to balance her own dreams with the American dream. With determination and wit, Cooper mines a lifetime of oppressive perfectionism for your laughter and enjoyment, as she moves from tech to comedy, marriage to divorce, smart to foolish, while proving once and for all that being foolish is actually the smartest thing you can do"-- Provided by publisher.
This resource is supported by the Institute of Museum and Library Services under the provisions of the Library Services and Technology Act as administered by State Library of Iowa.