Introduction: the seven principles for managing difficult conversations -- 1. Confidence: trusting yourself and the other party -- The land of should have, could have, would have -- New math: why things aren't adding up -- The problem with having conversations in your head -- Trust me: why you need to trust yourself -- Signs you don't trust yourself (and what to do about it) -- Using confidence to navigate difficult conversations -- Trust: the cornerstone of all relationships -- 2. Clarity: making your point clearly and listening with an open mind -- Let's be clear here -- Establishing the right objective -- Teh four factors to consider when preparing for a difficult conversation -- Planning for the worst and expecting the best -- Assessing your readiness to proceed -- Handling difficult conversations remotely -- Keeping your cool when things heat up -- Can you hear me now? -- Listen, don't assume -- Why the need to be right can bring about the wrong results -- 3. Compassion: be empathetic and understanding -- The need for compassion and empathy -- Putting yourself in someone else's shoes -- The art of building rapport -- Nonverbal communication and body language -- Slow down to speed up the conversation -- Being present -- Hyper-empathy: is there such a thing as caring too much? -- 4. Curiosity: asking questions rather than shutting down -- The power of inquisitiveness -- Tapping into your inner child -- Why curiosity didn't kill the cat -- Stop stifling curiosity in others -- The impact curiosity has on conversations -- Regaining control when a conversation derails -- 5. Compromise: earn respect by respecting others -- Achieving mutual respect -- Finding common ground -- Your cut, I'll choose -- You want me to de what? Using influence to get what you need -- Stepping back to move forward -- Dialing down highly charged conversations -- Caution: dead end ahead -- Knowing when to stop talking -- 6. Credibility: recognizing your word is only as good as your actions What credibility is -- What credibility is not -- The power of perception -- Reading the room: is your credibility on the decline? -- Changing perception: can it be done? -- Establishing credibility with remote employees -- 7. Courage: navigating the obstacles -- The courage of your talent -- Getting comfortable with discomfort -- Office politics: navigating highly charged conversations -- Choosing your battles wisely -- taking your power back: having the courage to stand up and advocate for yourself -- 8. Bringing it all together -- Putting the pieces together -- Out of this world difficult work conversations -- What to do next after an awkward conversation -- Creating a drama-free work environment -- Staying on track -- Keep talking.
Summary:
"Having difficult conversations at work is a necessary discomfort. Instead of avoiding these conversations with your boss, colleagues or direct reports, you need a strategy that won't leave you feeling like you were being talked at or ignored. The key to solving this problem starts and ends with changing the conversation. Recognizing that it takes two people to engage in meaningful conversation, Can We Talk? outlines what each contributor needs to do to achieve the best possible result. Illustrated with scenarios from everyday work situations, the author offers guidance on how to create the right conditions for a meaningful discussion as well as defining the seven key principles (confidence, clarity, compassion, curiosity, compromise, credibility and courage) that enable both parties to gain a deeper understanding of what the other person may be thinking and establish their point of view more clearly. Can We Talk? includes vignettes, advice from those who have been there and thrived, as well as lessons learned from conversation failures. Readers will learn how to prepare, start and manage the potentially challenging exchange of words that typically occur at work, and come away with an understanding that for any conversation to take place, both parties must engage. Scripts are provided to help readers get off to a running start"---Provided by publisher.
This resource is supported by the Institute of Museum and Library Services under the provisions of the Library Services and Technology Act as administered by State Library of Iowa.